The Purpose of Marriage

What is the purpose of marriage? 

People have varying opinions to that question. Some believe the purpose of marriage is to have tax benefits, others say to have companionship. Other opinions include the purpose of marriage to be traditional, or to have children. I believe that marriage is all of those things, however, I believe that the purpose of marriage is more. 

Marriage is becoming one as husband and wife. It is an opportunity for people to reach their potential and become perfected. Perfection is often thought of as without error or mistake, but it means being whole and complete. In order to fulfill their full potential, a man is not complete without a woman, and a woman is not complete without a man. I think that is a beautiful principle. We need one another and we have to opportunity to work together in an intimate and everyday relationship as husband and wife. 

While marriage is a wonderful thing and a great opportunity to progress as husband and wife, it does not come without challenges. Specifically, there are many adjustments that have to be made in the first month of marriage, the first year, and gradually throughout marriage as the couple learns and grows together. 

One of the adjustments that needs to be made early on is just the idea of caring for someone else. A person isn’t alone anymore and they have decided to share their life with another. This includes caring for them always. I realized this when my husband got sick the week after we were married. I wasn’t used to taking care of someone else when they were sick, and it was a good learning experience for me. Now, our relationship is strengthened because of the time we put in to care for one another. 

Another adjustment to make soon in a marriage is sharing everything, including a bed. This was an adjustment for my husband and me. I love to be cold when I sleep, and my husband loves to be warm. It took us some time to find a balance of air conditioning and blankets to where we can both sleep comfortably. 

Holidays and time spent with in-laws is another adjustment to make. Families celebrate holidays differently and there are many traditions that couples have to decide if they will include in their own families. Bryan and I have decided to spend time every other holiday with each of our families. Last year, we spent Independence Day with his family, Thanksgiving with mine, Christmas Eve with his, and Christmas Day with mine. This year, we’ve rotated that. This is not the only correct answer for how to split time with families, but it has been a good way for us to spend time with both his family and mine. 

I also believe one of the most important things to keep in mind when it comes to adjustments in marriage, is that it isn’t about compromise. It’s about sacrifice. A compromise between what both people want to do is not always a good idea. Making sacrifices for the benefit of the marriage is how to help make the marriage work. When both spouses are trying to meet the needs of the other and both have the attitude of always thinking of what they can give to the marriage instead of what they are getting out of the marriage, the marriage will be happier. 

Marriage is a blessing. It is an opportunity for two people to become one and to become the best version of themselves. It is a means to help people become complete and whole. And while it is such a wonderful thing, it comes with challenges and adjustments. If husband and wife work through the adjustments and are always working to strengthen the marriage, their marriages and families will be happier.